Is it me

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“Lou Lou skip to my lou,  Lou Lou skip to my Lou,  Lou Lou skip to my lou, skip to my lou my darling.”

I find these words disconcerting.

“I lost my partner what shall I do?”

Maybe proceed to the loo by yourself. The last time i checked it was a solitary activity.

“I lost my partner what shall i do?”

Suspicious indeed.

“Skip to my loo my darling.”

Yes, go along. Skip on to the loo my friend.

“I found another one better than you.”

Whoa, stop the presses. What?

“I found another one better than  you.”

Is anyone else hearing this?

“I found another one better than you.”

Stop the madness.

“Skip to my loo my darling.”

No! Stop that innocent child!

Maybe its just me but this sounds to me like a pedophiles creed. I sang this song with great abandon as a child but hearing my niece sing it took me aback while i deciphered the obscure meaning behind it. Maybe  I am a blundering idiot seeing spies where there are non but i think the author of this song is an evil genius pedophile who went to his grave a happy man.

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Self Indulgance

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I like to think myself an artist

Words my medium

Inspired by flights of fancy

Writing in a rhythm; Like dancing

Going through mellow lows and explosive highs

Most of the time even I don’t know what I have to say

So feel free to enjoy my many a canvass

And please feel free to excuse my eccentricities

Seperate Minds

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I am one and twenty

………………………………….She is one and twenty

Over the hill, past my shelf life

………………………………….At her prime, ripe and luscious

A spinster due to my finicky ways

…………………………………A feisty swan among docile ducks

Maybe just a future inductee to the spinster circuit

………………………………..I have to earn her love, I need it!

To be pitied and propositioned

……………………………….I will offer her all my wealth, my life

Maybe become a kept woman

……………………………….My position, my rank, my heart

Maybe traded for rank and dowry

………………………………I will give up my crown if she will have me

Maybe forever chaste like the virgin queen, I shudder

………………………………She can have the world if she wants, will she have me?

Oh well, lets enjoy my twilight years, who knows

…………………………..She holds court in her glory days, so beautiful , ethereal

Maybe my phantom will sweep me off my feet one day

……………………………I will fight to call her mine someday

My childhood friend, standing companion

…………………………..The love of my life, my heart

Sometimes I wonder if I stand between him and love

…………………………Does she love me, would I make her happy

I dread the day a lass catches his fancy

………………………..I shudder to think someone else could make her happy

For then who would laugh with me? Hold me or dance with me?

………………..Another man touching, holding or even sit by her feet

Call me selfish but I need him free to be with me

…………I would have to leave, retire to the country for with this I cannot live

I will be brave though, if I lose him I will be brave

………………If she finds someone I will wish her well, and wish him death

What if he were he? What a twist that would be!

…………………Maybe go over her head and ask for her hand from her sire

Off we go again, a smile firmly on my face

……….. The world intrudes again, maybe tonight I can steal another dance

What is this? He won’t dance with me? I am upset

…………………………………..I cannot do it! Destiny has broken me

Phantom standing between him and me

…………..That eager expectation as she  looks for him in the crowd and not me

Since the masked ball he won’t touch me

………………………………………I went to her and she walked away from me

Will barely look at me at all

………………………………………….not looking back, walked away from me

Trembling at the sight of me

…………………………….It’s so hard, my body shakes from wanting thee

Is his broken heart taking him away from me?

…………………My heavy heart needs to get away from this

Or maybe find with whom I am meant to be?

Her ignorance is not his bliss

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With a bittersweet smile he gazed at me

Looking like he had something he had to say to me

In my mind I wondered who his girl would be

This friend of mine who is the best there can be

Flesh and blood and loyal to a fault

If I were a man and he a lady, I would court him so.

-.-

I look at her, perfect as can be

I look at her and wonder what could be

I look at her and need to say

“Have you ever known that your plus one

Is the one?

Have you ever wanted to walk into a room

with her on your arm?

Have you ever wanted someone so much

It left a bruise on your heart?

Have you ever held the love of your whole life in your arms

Knowing you had to let go?

Hoping for a sign, a nod, an acknowledgement

With non forthcoming!

Have you ever had to sit back

While others threw their hats in the ring

While in your heart of hearts

You know that between you and she

It was meant to be

Have you ever wanted to be the sparkle in your person’s eye

See your face in your love’s child

Because I have, I do every day!”

-.-

With fleeting sadness and sorrow only I could see on his face

He proceeds to laugh of my heartfelt dismay!

“I am the rake of rakes, i would not know of such nonesense

My heart belongs to only you my love”

Was he serious ?

I don’t know

But why were his lips curved but his eyes so sad?

Looking like a man of acute illness of amore

Utterly perplexed I asked my friend

For there is no secrets between us

“Who is this lady holder of your heart?”

I would go and plead his case

Or petition for his heart release

Surely she must be ignorant not knowing she denies him his bliss

Even before my phantom there was always him

No red blooded woman could help but love him it seems.

Monotony of my existance

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I swear I am at my wit’s end

Suitors patrolling the revolving door that is the dowry coffers

Like sharks sniffing out bleeding prey

Interrupting the gentle monotony that is my existence

As I am primed and prodded

Padded and powdered

For another tea

With another madam

God forbid I declare my preference to read

Maybe sit for a sip of sherry and a lively rapport

About politics no less

Oh, but it’s just not done

The highlight of my day

A dear childhood friend

Dashing specimen of masculinity

Who lets me laugh from the belly, curse and sip sherry

Argue my point, roll me eyes and be friendly

He regaled me with tales of his escapades and adventures

Lies to me about how special it would have been, had I been

Today though, I do not hang on his every word

His presence makes my mind wonder to another man

A special someone

A phantom of sorts

My one dance phantom

Distracted I ask

As only he I can ask

Have you ever met someone who ruins your life

By making you feel alive

Wrecks havoc on your life

With an effort not worth two pence

Have you ever lived a moment

That turns out to be your defining moment?

It simply won’t do

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I remember when I left you your arms

A giggling mess of mass hysteria

Behind a flawless facade of impeccable decorum

Swooning and acting like a complete  simpleton simply won’t do

Holding onto the whimsical moments

When my life, the earth and time stood still to acknowledge you

Bidding adieu and a tout a lheur

With a pleasant smile and a curtsy

I feel your eyes on me, willing me to look back

Every step away from you is a crime against nature

My heart breaks a little more with every footfall in the wrong direction

My carriage awaits me, as it should

At the edge of this crime scene

Cool nods, footmen and footstools later

The ridiculous affair of arranging me in my carriage

God forbid the crease is out of place or the lace lays wrong

In this pitch black ride

It’s just not done!

Like an orphan child at Christmas

I want to press my powdered nose to the carriage window

Maybe get a glance of you

Instead I sit here, head high, back straight, shoulders back

Like a sentry one would state; Society dictates

No slumping young lady! It’s just not done

The closer I get to my Golden tower

The more ridiculous my inner turmoil seems

Surely weakness of the flesh is beneath me

Such a common affliction

Surely I will let this pass

This ridiculous flight of fancy

…”will I ever see you again?”

That First Dance

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He looked at me

Slate gray eyes

Dead pan face behind a phantom mask

I could swear he looked at me

Cowering away behind my intricate mask

Keeping up appearances

As any proper woman should

I could almost swear he saw the fraud in me

Mind wondering in tawdry paces

I can almost see his smirk as he acknowledges the harlot in me

Special thought crosses my mind and I gasp

“AH”

My shame a public spectacle

Modesty slaps me across the face leaving me red

And deliciously ashamed

Like a predator smelling injured prey

His head cocks up in my direction

And he smiled

I know he did because my heart stopped

Like a deer in headlights I search for the hostess

Can you point me to the nearest exit please!

I am on fire!

My body screams leave

And i turn to make haste

Bid the Duchess adieu

While my heart is still intact

But alas! Etiquette betrays me

In the hour it takes to gather my skirts

You have me in your arms

A willing abductee to a charming Blackbeard

Dancing the Foxtrot at an unbecoming abandon

Pardon the blush, with you I am so wanton!

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